Chapter 32 Post

So FINALLY I've updated!
Thank you guys so, so, so much for everything. You are all really exceptionally wonderful.

Oh, one thing I wanted to address was my using Operation Mancy instead of Operation Cloony. Operation Cloony is OBVIOUSLY the better name, no doubt about it. But I didn't want to steal anyone's idea, so I didn't use it. In my brain, the ship is Cloony, even if the Op isn't =P

So I'll chat a bit about Chapter 33 now.
It's called "Of Marlene."
It's a Marlene chapter (SHOOT WHO KNEW?!)
Expect:
    Quidditch
    Adam
    Prudence
    Operation Mancy
    The return of Miles Stimpson

“Good evening, housemates,” Shelley’s voice cut through the brisk air. She had turned in her seat and, as though just noticing Lily and Carlotta, smiled broadly at them
 “Hello,” sighed Lily, probably anticipating an altercation.
 “Hello, Shelley,” said Carlotta. “What a pleasant surprise: I didn’t realize you could leave your coffin before sunset.”
 Shelley rolled her eyes, rising from her bench and climbing up to the higher level where her two housemates sat. Lily was immediately next to the wooden wall at the edge of the stand, meaning that the only available seat was beside Carlotta, who scooted closer to the redhead when Shelley sat down.

-Chapter 32

I was writing this scene and got extremely amused by the idea of redhead, brunette, and blonde sitting in a row--Carlotta and Shelley bickering and Lily just rolling her eyes wanting to die--during Quidditch tryouts. Lol so I drew it.

The Fat Lady—for that is whom he addressed—huffed. “It’s a matter of aesthetics, boy. Decorum. The dignity of these hallowed halls, through which your own forefathers, distant and recent, walked themselves, I’m certain...”

“My distant forefathers,” Sirius interrupted, “were, in all likelihood, muggle-hating chauvinists, if my more recent ones and the general habits of their contemporaries are anything to judge by. So I’ll smoke where I damn well please.”

“Well...” James swallowed. “What are you doing here?”

“I was exploring,” said Valentina. “But I’m not sure which floor I’m on.”

“The second.”

“The second,” Valentina echoed. “West Wing?”

“That’s right. Do you—er... live here?”

“No, I’m in the East Wing.”

“No, I mean...” Children were so dense sometimes. “Do you live in the castle?”

“We used to have fun, didn’t we?” asked Charlie, ignoring her question.

“No. We used to have angry sex.”

“That’s what I meant. What happened to that anyway?”

“You started to fancy me, and tentacles are a turn off."




(P.S. Chapter 32 features Charlie Plex POV--I'm not sure I've ever done that before =P)

Just a Few Things

The thing is, in the last week, my entire life got pulled up by the roots, twirled around some Hagrid-sized being's head, and thrown down again on the grass, left to its own devices to re-root and work all the biology shit out all by its lonesome.

BTW, my life is a tree apparently.

Fortunately, I am apparently quite adept at gardening, and I like to think that for the time being, all is mostly as it should be again. 

Thank-you for your patience, and I shall endeavor to get this chapter finished as quickly as possible.

If I have been grouchy with anyone around here or on tumblr, I am sorry. 

AND, I hope you all enjoyed "Snaps." I don't really know where that came from. I had the idea for Snaps being about James's heart condition (lol, not literally) rather than the delicious treat for some time, but I was walking along and the rest of the story just sort of came to me, so I scribbled it up and posted it, and I am just glad that you liked it. 

For those of you who think it's deterring me from writing Chapter 32, however, fear not. I was having a bit of a... well... dry spell (see Lily circa Chapter 19). Going 24 hours without writing anything creative is really unheard of for me, so the fact that I went several days was thoroughly displeasing. But "Snaps" sort of got me in a mode again, and I wrote a bunch over the last two days, so hopefully, I'm back on track.

So on to nicer things: here's some stuff I can tell you about Chapter 32.

Bridget Shacklebolt makes a return.

Marlene and Prudence have a chat.

Donna helps Marlene with something.

Donna, Lily, and--to a lesser degree--Remus have crises of conscience.

James has a touch of insecurity.

Sirius has a touch of angst. 

(And yet somehow this is a rather upbeat chapter).

There's a reference to Chapter 24 that made me go "AWWWW" when I wrote it (and puppies rejoiced).

Puppies won't be rejoicing on the Quidditch Pitch.

Puppies will be at least moderately pleased in the Head student office.

And for anyone freaking out about threats of sex scenes: I can't write anything graphic to save my liiife. I think of Allison Janney in "Ten Things I Hate About You" and I just can't. I'm a fade-to-black kind of girl. (Not that there's anything fade-to-blacky going on in Chapter 32... (I don't know yet, actually), but I felt I should touch on this.)

Much love to everyone, and thank-you for the feedback on "Snaps," which I just checked and has 51 reviews. Oh my god, you guys, thank you!

Have a wonderful, wonderful day/night/whatever.

Love,

Jules

P.S. what the hell? Excerpt?

“Well,” she began stiffly, “I suppose—rubbish as it is—I’m sympathetic.”
 “To... Shelley?”
 “No, not to Shelley. She’s a stupid bint.”

Sirius grinned. “Alright, you pass. What’s your name again?”

“Clancy Goshawk.”

“And I’m...”

“Sirius Black,” she finished for him.

“I love when people do that,” remarked Sirius. “I feel famous."

I know I posted an excerpt this morning, but I just wrote this, and I thought you would all enjoy it....

“Can I help you, Laces?” 

 “What?” 

 “What-what?” 

 “Why did you just call me ‘Laces?’” 

 “Because yours are uncommonly straight.” 

4/27

“Mumps." 

 Shelley paused in the combing of her platinum fringe and looked at Donna in the reflection of the mirror. 

 “Yes?” 

 Never in recent memory had Donna dreaded an action quite as much as she dreaded this one. She sat down on the bed closest to Shelley, fidgeting with her curly hair and forcefully maintaining a complete lack of eye contact with the other witch. 

 “I have to talk to you.” 

 Shelley raised her eyebrows. “You what?” 

 “I have to talk to you,” Donna repeated forcibly. 

 Frowning, the blonde turned in her chair to face Donna. “Seriously?” 

 “Yes, I know, it’s bizarre for me, too,” said Donna, rolling her eyes.

New Chapter title!

As of now, Chapter 32 is called,
"Evolutionary Theory and the Facts of Infidelity."

Cheerful enough, Donna walked along the second floor corridor in the direction of the Charms department. The hallways were always the best kind of empty at hours like this—mealtimes—and Donna could stroll without fear of bumping into anyone, her mind occupied by pleasant things like Ancient Runes translations and the biography of Cornelius Agrippa that Lily had lent to her. 

 She was just debating which—the translations or the biography—she would pursue first after supper, when the unfortunate witch rounded a corner. 

 What she saw, about twenty feet away, made Donna think she might lose her lunch.

To the estimable Lily Evans,

I rather prefer not putting my name on the front of envelopes, as it often means that the recipient will disregard the letter altogether, and all of my extensive time spent writing and re-writing and fretting over the exact wording of my carefully plotted letter shall be in vain (Only joking. I don’t do any of that).

But now you’ve read this far, you’ve already spent this much time reading, and are therefore invested in the outcome of this note, so I shall reveal my identity.

It’s Sam. Sam Dearborn. Egbert the Incompetent’s brother. You remember me, right? Handsome bloke, tall, fantastic hair, kills in a fedora...

Right, that’s me.

And you’re Lily Evans.

What-ho.

And you’re probably wondering why in the name of all that is magical I’ve decided to write to you, approximately one month after our brief and tumultuous affair. The truth of the matter is that I’m bored stiff at the moment, for my best mate and partner-in-crime, the incomparable Sarah McKinnon, has landed herself in one of those new fangled thing-a-ma-bobs, a relationship.

Complete nonsense, if you ask me. (Not really: the bloke’s a dream, and he dotes on her, but that’s neither here nor there).

They’ve been seeing each other for months, but now Sarah up and decides that she’s in love with this Devil’s Spawn, and she spends five evenings a week with him, and she’s just oh so rapturous that poor Sam gets shoved to the side, along with all our plans to someday be old spinsters together, sitting around on a porch somewhere with our eighty-seven cats, playing sedate card games and making rude remarks at passersby, because old people may say whatever judgmental things they like without fear of punishment.

Obviously, this is a problem, because what if Sarah marries this bloke? What if she has a dozen children with him? I wouldn’t mind, except he’ll be something of a time suck, and it might actually mean I have to meet people! Talk to people I don’t know! Make new friends! SOCIALIZE!  It’s utter rubbish.

Actually, I’m just dead bored right now. I’ve written to dear cousin James twice in the last week, and he’s only responded once, and I choose to blame this on the fact that he is also relationshippy at the moment. I suppose you’ve heard all about that—well, I know you have—since, apparently your little school has done everything short of lynching this poor bird. Are you a member of this torch-carrying, “Burn the witch!” screaming majority? Personally, I think you’d make a lousy leader of a lynch mob.

I thought you’d be interested to know that I have had my first encounter with my brother since the end of his tenure as head of DMLE. It was unpleasant, to be sure, especially since the family rather sided with Eggie, and things at home have been rather tense. But life goes on, doesn’t it?

I’m reaching the end of my slight firewhiskey buzz and therefore the end of this letter, and I feel the overwhelming compulsion to be honest with you, Ginger, so here it is.

The truth of the matter is not that I am either lonely or bored, but that I am writing to you because I am avoiding writing a letter that I should be writing. You are a vehicle for my procrastination, if you will. Because, you see, while it is true that Sarah is in the raptures of a new relationshit, I find myself precariously close to the same. And there it is... I’ve met someone, and feel that if I do not wait out this firewhiskey buzz, I may actually do something extremely unwise and arrange a date.

You see, Ginger, in my brief tenure as a Hogwarts student, I was a Hufflepuff—as you know—and Hufflepuffs, for all of their virtues, are not particularly brave.

At any rate, feel free to respond poste-haste, and do not feel free to ignore this letter, or I will be thoroughly upset with you. Unless you, too, have fallen into the relationship trap, in which case, I shall have to lose faith with all of this highly sentimental humanity and jump off a tall bridge without a broomstick.

You understand my meaning, yeah?

With high regards from,

Sam Dearborn

Questions, Questions, Quesssttionnsss

Here are some FAQs of late that I would like to take this opportunity--me being sick in bed--to answer.

You--Jules--said that Chapter 35 is gonna be epic. Are James and Carlotta going to break up then?

No. James and Carlotta's break up is NOT scheduled for Chapter 35.

Here are some things that you CAN expect from Chapter 35:

A kiss between two people who are not dating (one of whom is dating someone else)

The return of Colista Black

A Frank and Alice cameo

Suckiness

Not a James/Carlotta break up

When are you going to update, Jules?

When is ur face going to update?

(AKA idk, sorry)

I typically update around once a month. Although I try to be quicker, I usually fail

Is the guy at the beginning of the prologue Luke?

This has received much speculation and is the forerunner amongst theories, especially in Luke's small but vocal fan club possibly consisting only of Todd. It has not, however, been confirmed.

Regarding the last line of Chapter 31: 

"He did. Right?"

Lily's question is kind of rhetorical. It's like, "I'll get over it. It can't be too hard. He did it, yeah?" Not that she really honestly believes it's gonna be a piece of cake, but like that's what she's saying to put a brave face on it. At any rate, it was not intended to be read, "He got over me, right? Right? RIGHT?! ANSWER ME NOW, BITCHES!" I think the italicization of "right," might have made that confusing, and I apologize!

Why is Sirius calling Lily "Snitch" and Carlotta "Quaffle?"

Chapter 19, "The Quaffle and the Snitch," has James quoting his dear old mother as saying, "Don't chase the Quaffle if you see the Snitch." Although, as Reginald Cattermole points out, James is a chaser and he would get in trouble for catching the snitch. But, as James would observe, "It's a metaphor, damn it."

Why is Sirius opposed to Puppy Killing (James/Carlotta)?

Obviously because his animagus form is a dog

This is actually a very complicated question. I know it seems like kind of a cop out to some people, having Sirius a L/J shipper at this stage, but this will be dealt with in greater detail throughout seventh year, so I won't talk about it too much here and now. Just know that I have thought this through, and it's not solely for all the comic potential (although, of course, I enjoy that). I will say that a small part of it is that Sirius disliked James/Carlotta for the same reason that most of you guys dislike it (more than Lily/Luke, for example). There is a certain degree of THREAT to Carlotta, because she's Carlotta (I mean, not really, L/J4life and all that, but you know what I mean), and Sirius doesn't want his best mate taken away. So, why he would then support James/Lily is really what sort of gets figured out later on. 

Was Shelley sincere about wanting to make up with Carlotta?

Negative (for now).

okay, there are probably, and by probably I mean definitely, more, but I can't find them immediately with minimum effort so if anybody else has a question, feel free to ask. 

Love and cookies,

Jules

Goodnight!

But before I depart, here's a teeny tiny excerpt.

"Who are you?”  

“Who am I? Who are you?” 

“I’m Valentina.”  

“I’m James.”   

“Oh.”   

She continued to stare at him with her large black eyes, and James continued to regard her with the utmost suspicion.   

Which was ridiculous, he realized, because she was about ten.

4/14

This post requires more music.
I'm thinking back to the times when I posted on blogspot every day (there was maybe one month where this happened) and feeling like I should be like that more often.
SO...
Here's another excerpt, because I'm too lazy to say anything brilliant.

“Donna.” Marlene poked her shoulder, and Donna started. 

 “What?” she asked loudly. “What? What do you want?” 

 “Is there a particular reason why you’re staring at Shelley Mumps like that?” asked Marlene, amused. Mary raised her eyebrows. 

 “Are you trying to make her explode with wandless magic?” she asked brightly. “Because I would fully support that decision.”

Love,
Jules

4/13

My current jam... although it's inspiring my original material muse more than my Chapter 32 muse. 

Still. Relevant. Ingrid Michaelson is both my Clancy Goshawk and Marlene Price muse. 

Aaaand a tiny excerpt:

James shrugged. “I guess.” He didn’t think he conveyed nonchalance very convincingly; Lily didn’t seem to buy it, at any rate. “I just... he shouldn’t have done it. It should have been Remus.”

“It couldn’t be Remus, James. You know that.”

He did. It was bloody unfair, but it couldn’t have been Remus. 

P.S. Random update: BOTH songs I want to use for the song title are too late. "I Want You To Want Me" is from 1977 and "Is She Really Going Out With Him" is from '78.
SIGH.
The struggles of being me.

Especially these patrols. This was her third time patrolling with him, and Lily was always left feeling guilty. After all...

He had a girlfriend.

Couldn’t she just… just... forget that she fancied him? Then, spending time with him wouldn’t make her feel like—well, honestly, like the Carlotta to James’s Frank Longbottom.

Damn it all.

Perhaps she’d better steer clear of James Potter for a few days.

Chapter 32 Non-Spoilers

Once again, a quick recap of what Non-Spoilers are.
Non spoilers are just random bits of information that carry either very little significance or no clear significance for the next chapter. They were invented because I am a spoiler whore.

Chapter 32 Non-Spoilers

Donna sees too much.

Sirius needs a hug from me.


Remus studies in the library.

Lily eats toast, fruit, and bacon for breakfast.

My favorite character, Lily's Green Apple Shampoo, returns.

Dumbledore is not obsessed with James.

A schedule is changed.

Lily wears her hair in a bun.

Marlene has more chemistry.

Excerpt 4/6

“She’s really nice, too.”
 “Mmm.”
 “And pretty...”
 “Okay, you’re not being subtle, Lily.”
 Lily tried to look innocent. “I don’t know what you mean.”
 “I mean, I know what you’re doing, and it’s not going to work.”
 “What am I doing?”
 “You’re... implying.”
 Lily raised her eyebrows. “What am I implying?”
 “Something ridiculous and impossible and not even worth mentioning.”